I do a little bit of everything. I'm a complicated man without a plan. If I could be one thing besides myself, I would love to be a mountain. Hopefully I can figure out how to be a mountain. I would also love to be a hard wood tree. None of that soft wood sappy shit. It would also be cool to be a Roman candle on the 4th of July. I hate the sound of a phone ringing. Sometimes when I wake up I check to see if I woke up a Viking. When I realize that I am not I immediately destroy my surroundings (resulting in a lofty refurnishings bill), pillage the refrigerator and rape it of all its delicious nutrients. My Origin: I was conceived by my father who stands at an astonishing 14 feet tall, and weighs in at over 560 pounds. He met my mother at a local bar and proceeded to impress her by eating the other possible suiters attempting to get with her. With no time wasted they scurried to the back alley and my father blew a load like a shotgun blast through my mothers back, clearly destroying her. What layed upon the wall in the aftermath, was a three headed beast, which consisted of me, and my two brothers Numcy and Jerry. We fought for hours and separated from eachother, then proceeded to eat my dead mothers remains. We were then forced into mortal combat with my father, to which I lost brother Jerry, and dear old dad. Numcy traveled north to the outer regions of Ontario, and from what I understand has successfully mated with the great Kodiak bear. I however, travelled South with one intention...to conquer the known world with a stern iron fist. I enjoy all types of music. I grew up in the grunge/post-grunge era so I obviously am a giant fan of that style. Type O Negative is my primo pick followed closely by the Misfits.

Death Defying.